


The Taste of Christmas

by Pink_Tinted_Monocle



Category: Cobra Kai (Web Series)
Genre: Christmas fic, M/M, crack and smut and fluff, lawrusso
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-23
Updated: 2020-12-23
Packaged: 2021-03-11 05:47:14
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,546
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28270089
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Pink_Tinted_Monocle/pseuds/Pink_Tinted_Monocle
Summary: In which Daniel and Johnny’s plans for Christmas Eve sexy times are derailed due to Daniel’s questionable choice of condoms.Cracky smutty lawrusso fluff.  Merry Christmas everyone!
Relationships: Daniel LaRusso/Johnny Lawrence
Comments: 16
Kudos: 72





	The Taste of Christmas

Daniel was already at the front of the line, unloading his groceries onto the conveyer belt, when the message from Johnny flashed up on his phone.

_Need condoms._

Daniel swore under his breath. 

“I’m so sorry”, he said to the disgruntled cashier, holding up his hands in what he hoped was a placating gesture and flashing his most winning car salesman smile. “I’ll be back in moment, I just gotta grab something else quick.”

He ran to the sexual wellbeing aisle, picked up the nearest box of condoms and sprinted back to the checkout. The cashier was waiting for him, lips pursed and arms folded, while a few of the other customers started to tut and shake their heads at him.

“Hey, hurry up buddy!”, yelled one guy a few places down from Daniel in the queue. “It’s Christmas Eve, some of us have got places to be!”

“Look, I’m sorry OK?”, Daniel replied, handing the condoms to the cashier.

The guy snorted in derision. “Yeah? How about we take this outside, old man? Then we’ll see who’s sorry.”

Daniel looked him up and down. Mid-twenties, about 170 pounds, poor muscle definition. A single crane kick to the face would probably be enough to take him out.

“Yeah”, said Daniel as he paid and packed up his groceries. “I’m sure we would.”

**********************************************************************************

Daniel’s phone rang as he pulled out of the store parking lot. He pressed the button on the steering wheel to put it through to the car speakers.

“Hey.”

“Hey yourself”, replied Amanda. “Please tell me you’ve got the cranberries, I can’t have a repeat of last year with your mother.”

“Yeah, I got them.”

Amanda let out a sigh of relief. “Thank God. Although I still don’t understand why you have to go out on Christmas Eve to buy fresh cranberries just so your mom can make her own sauce when she gets here. The sauce that the caterers are bringing is just as good if not better than the lumpy stuff she makes.”

Daniel rolled his eyes. “It’s tradition, you know that. And anyway, it keeps her busy.”

“Well, that’s true. But don’t roll your eyes at me.”

“How did you know I was rolling my eyes?”

“I could hear it in your voice.”

“You know that doesn’t make any sense.”

“Whatever”, said Amanda, and Daniel suspected she was rolling her eyes at him. “When will you be back?”

“An hour or two; I’ve just got to stop off at Johnny’s.”

“Oh yeah?” asked Amanda, and Daniel could hear the smirk in her voice. “Fitting in a little karate before Christmas?”

Daniel felt a blush rise up his neck. “Hey, you can talk. Didn’t Carmen come over this morning?”

“Yeah, but we just had sex. We didn’t feel the need to fight in a tournament, pine after each other for thirty years and then open rival dojo’s while secretly banging each other like rabbits.”

Daniel pulled a face. “Touché.”

“Hey!”, said Amanda. “I’m only telling the truth, don’t pull a face like that at me!”

“How did you know I was pulling a face? And since when could you tell what my facial expressions are without actually being able to see my face?”

“Since I’ve been married to you for twenty years. Anyway, have fun and I’ll see you later. Oh, and put the cranberries in Johnny’s refrigerator, don’t just leave them in the trunk. If you get home with them all hot and mushy and your mom starts shouting I will not be held accountable for my actions.”

**********************************************************************************

Daniel had barely knocked on Johnny’s door when it flew open, revealing a tousled haired, plaid shirt wearing Johnny Lawrence on the other side. 

Daniel grinned. “Were you waiting for me, Johnny?”, he asked as Johnny backed up so Daniel could enter the apartment.

“In your dreams, LaRusso”, said Johnny as Daniel closed the door. “Thought you were the mailman; I got Miguel to order me some nunchucks from the Internet for class. It’s going to be _badass_.”

“You know giving actual nunchucks to teenagers is a terrible – “, Daniel began, but Johnny cut him off mid-sentence with a kiss.

As the kiss deepened and they began to stumble towards the bedroom, Daniel went to wrap his arms around Johnny’s neck when he realised his hands were still full. He pulled back reluctantly.

“I just – I just gotta put these in the refrigerator”, he said apologetically, holding out the cranberries.

Johnny wrinkled his nose at the berries and stepped back as if Daniel had been holding something horrifying, like a dead rat or a severed finger.

“You got me fruit, LaRusso?”, he asked, disgust evident in his voice.

Daniel rolled his eyes for the second time that day. “They’re not for you, Johnny. They’re for my mom.”

Johnny stared at Daniel incredulously. “Your mom’s coming here?”

“No, my mom’s not – look, it’s a long story, OK? Go get ready, I’ll be in in a minute.”

Johnny disappeared into the bedroom, still looking confused, while Daniel walked quickly over to the refrigerator. By the time he’d made room for the fruit amongst the bottles of Coors Banquet and discounted meat and hotfooted it to the bedroom, Johnny was already undressed and lying on top of the covers with one hand propping up his head.

Daniel batted his eyelashes at Johnny flirtatiously as he started to quickly shed his own clothes.

“What’s a guy like you doing in a place like this?”, he asked huskily as he unbuttoned his shirt.

Johnny blinked in bewilderment. “It’s my bedroom LaRusso, and I’m in here ‘cause we’re about to bang. Wait, did you just forget that? What, did you trip over one of those tiny trees and hit your head or something?”

“I know where we are, Johnny and no, I didn’t fall over a bonsai”, Daniel said, exasperated, as he pulled off his pants. “I was just trying to be – you know what, never mind. Just come here and kiss me.”

Daniel took off his underwear and joined Johnny on the bed, climbing on top of the blonde. They kissed, passionate and hungry, and Daniel ran his hands through Johnny’s hair.

After a minute Johnny broke the kiss, panting heavily, before moving his lips to Daniel’s ear and nipping the lobe.

“Tell me what you want, LaRusso.”

Daniel’s breath caught in his chest and Johnny moved his lips lower, nuzzling Daniel’s neck as he ran his hands up and down the smaller man’s back.

“I – I want you to blow me”, Daniel moaned. “And then I want you to fuck me.”

Johnny raised his head and grinned wolfishly at Daniel. They kissed again and as they did so Johnny rolled them over so he was on top. He started to kiss his way down Daniel’s body until his reached his cock.

“You get the condoms?” he asked.

“Jacket pocket”, Daniel panted, and Johnny reached over the side of the bed and fished the packet out of the pile of Daniel’s clothing on the floor. 

Johnny fumbled with the box for a few seconds before he got it open, then plucked out a condom and ripped his open with his hands before sliding it down over Daniel’s erection. (Daniel was just thankful that Johnny had stopped trying to tear them open with his teeth; he had ruined a lot of condoms that way since they’d starting seeing each other. “It’s an alpha move, it gets the chicks wet”, Johnny had explained to Daniel one night. “It’s a wonder it doesn’t get the chicks _pregnant_ ”, Daniel had retorted, looking at a condom studded with teeth marks and tiny holes. “Well, there is Robby”, Johnny had replied.)

Daniel gasped in pleasure as the wet heat of Johnny’s mouth enveloped his cock, although it only lasted a few seconds before Johnny pulled back, face screwed up.

“What?”, asked Daniel as he bucked his hips, desperate to get that feeling back. “Why did you stop?”

Johnny licked his lips. “The condom tastes weird.”

“Weird how?”

Johnny frowned. “Like… toothpaste.”

“Toothpaste?”, asked Daniel, eyebrows raised.

“Yeah, like peppermint. You get flavoured ones?”

“I don’t think so”, said Daniel, thinking back to the store. “Although I didn’t actually check the packet…”

Johnny grabbed the box again and looked at the back.

“’Holiday flavours”, he read. “A selection of latex condoms with the flavours of your favourite Thanksgivings and Christmas treats.’” He looked down at Daniel still sheathed penis. “I think this one is ‘Candy cane’. Jesus LaRusso, really? What were you thinking?”

“I didn’t know they were flavoured!”, Daniel protested. “I was already at the checkout when I got your message so I just ran back and picked up the nearest box! Look, there must be some flavours in there that are OK.”

There wasn’t.

Johnny refused to try ‘Green Bean Casserole’ (“I don’t like green stuff!” “How have you reached middle age without dying of scurvy?” asked Daniel), ‘Eggnog’ (“I don’t want to get drunk off your dick.” “I don’t think there’s any actual alcohol in these condoms, Johnny. And anyway, aren’t you already drunk?”) and ‘Gingerbread’ (“I hate those little men with their tiny eyes, they’re always looking at me.” Daniel had no response to that). Eventually, Johnny agreed to try ‘Turkey’, and Daniel had his cock sucked for a blissful ten seconds before Johnny’s stomach rumbled and he pulled back.

“No, can’t do this one either. It’s just making me hungry.”

Daniel groaned. “Fine, forget the blowjob. Just fuck me, OK?”

“What?” Johnny exclaimed, “You think I’m going to put one of those things on my dick, LaRusso? I don’t want my penis to smell like vegetables or roast meat!”

“The flavour is on the outside, Johnny!”, Daniel explained, but Johnny refused to back down.

“And I’m not going bareback”, said Johnny. “I don’t know where you’ve been.”

In truth, Daniel hadn’t been with anyone apart from Johnny for over six months. When he and Amanda had decided to try an open marriage, he had explained the situation to Johnny and suggested they try a casual relationship. This in itself was ridiculous because of all the words that could be used to describe his and Johnny’s relationship over the years, ‘casual’ was not one of them. But although they kept it informal, there wasn’t anyone else Daniel wanted. After Amanda had started seeing Carmen, Daniel and Amanda had come to realise that although they still loved each other the physical attraction was gone from their marriage. They hadn’t talked about separation or divorce yet; they were still happy in their own way, for the moment, but maybe one day they would. Daniel also secretly suspected that Johnny hadn’t been with anyone else either since they’d started hooking up. He’d tried to ask Johnny a couple of times if there was anyone else, but just got vague answers about there being ‘hot babes’ that he hooked up with from time to time. (“So just women? Daniel had asked once. “You don’t see other guys?” “Oh yeah”, Johnny had replied hastily, “There are also loads of hot – er – guy babes.” He had quickly changed the subject after that.)

But even though Daniel did really want to have sex with Johnny in that moment, he wasn’t ready to have that conversation yet; to admit that they could probably go without protection because neither of them had been interested in being with anyone else for a long time.

So instead he just sighed and removed the condom from his softening cock. Johnny stood up and pulled his underwear on, before Daniel followed suit. He rubbed his temples as they walked into the living room and Johnny stretched out on the sofa and turned on the TV.

“I think I’m getting a headache.”

Johnny rolled his eyes. “Quit your bitchin’, LaRusso. Just grab me a Banquet from the refrigerator and I’ll give you a handjob while we watch _Iron Eagle_.”

Daniel walked across the room to get Johnny’s Coors, and as he did so pulled open a drawer in the kitchen area, searching for Advil. There weren’t any painkillers in the drawer, but just as he was about to close it something shiny caught his eye. He moved aside a case of old batteries and saw underneath a handful of metallic squares. He picked one up and flipped it over. It was still in date.

“Johnny”, he said as calmly as possible. “Did you not know that you have condoms in this drawer?”

Johnny turned to look at Daniel, eyes wide. “Oh shit, do I?”

Daniel leaned on the kitchen counter, gaze fixed on Johnny. When he spoke, his voice was almost a growl.

“Get in the goddamn bedroom right now, Johnny Lawrence.”

**********************************************************************************

Afterwards they lay tangled up in each other, boneless and sated. Daniel’s head was on Johnny’s chest, and he felt so warm and comfortable that soon his eyelids began to droop.

Just as he was about to drift off to sleep, Johnny poked him in the side.

“Hey, LaRusso, don’t you have to get going and give that weird fruit to your mom?”

“Yeah”, Daniel said sleepily, snuggling up closer to Johnny. “I’ll go in a minute.”

“Are your family coming to yours for Christmas?”, Johnny asked.

“Uh, yeah. My mom, cousin Louie and Amanda’s parents come to ours every year.”

“Must be nice to have a family who actually want to spend time with you”, Johnny said, a little sadly, and Daniel realised with a pang of guilt that he had no idea what’s Johnny’s Christmas plans were. He had a sudden vision of Johnny sitting alone in his drab, undecorated apartment, drinking himself into a stupor before passing out on the couch.

“What are you doing, Johnny? Look, if you’re going to be alone I can always see if I can escape for an hour or two and come over. Or, ah, maybe you could come to mine, you know, just for a bit-”

“Relax LaRusso, I’m fine. Carmen and Miguel invited me over. And even if they hadn’t I couldn’t come to yours and you know it; your family hate me.”

“My family doesn’t hate you!”, Daniel protested.

Johnny raised an eyebrow.

“Well, at least Amanda doesn’t hate you.”

“I’m good LaRusso. But, ah, thanks for thinking about me.”

_I’m always thinking about you,_ thought Daniel.

They lapsed into silence and Daniel felt sleep tugging at his eyelids again. Reluctantly he got up, leaving Johnny’s warm embrace, and got dressed. He fetched the cranberries from the kitchen before returning to the bedroom to give Johnny a lingering kiss goodbye.

“I’ll message you next week, let you know when I can come over again”, said Daniel, cupping Johnny’s face with one hand and rubbing his thumb over his cheek.

“Yeah”, said Johnny.

They smiled at each other for a moment before Johnny cleared his throat and looked away.

“I mean, whatever LaRusso. Not like I don’t have tons of hot babes who I can hook up with if you’re too busy.”

“Oh yeah”, said Daniel, trying not to laugh. “Hot babes and hot guy babes. Gotcha.”

They kissed again before Daniel pulled back and walked across the room. Just before he reached the doorway he turned back. 

“Johnny?”

“Yeah, LaRusso?”

“Merry Christmas.”

**Author's Note:**

> I don’t think all of these exact condoms exist (seriously, what mad person would make green bean casserole flavoured condoms? Who would buy them?), but I saw an article about Christmas flavoured condoms a while back (think they were the Candy cane ones) and just ran with it.
> 
> Anyway, hope you enjoyed this! Merry Christmas all you lovely lawrusso shippers!


End file.
